15 January 2001

Hello! Lol, okay I lied, because I ended up having sex with Jeff on my period anyway.

I'm never sure if he...knows that I'm on my period? Like I feel I should warn him or something (or ask for permission to continue?) but then I don't say anything. At the same time, I'm not going to be really forward and get him in the mood, because...well, because I am all gross-i-fied and what not, so it doesn't feel like my place to persue sex on a night like that.

But Thursday night, I think he was definitly interested, but it took so long to get us naked and going.

It's funny how much I must be the one who's stripping off all the clothes or something. But I guess it's good to have a lot of that foreplay or whatever.

Speaking of sex, I am the biggest....dork? I don't know. Okay so a day or so ago, I was bored and horny and I looked up dildo on a search engine and--(gasp)--purchased one! Lol, I am still laughing and in disbelief. From Penthouse no less. Well, this will be interesting. Haha, it's being sent to my parent's house. "A touch of Class" is the return address, so not totally obvious, but I just hope they don't ask me what's inside when I come home in a couple weeks to greet it. :)

Ummmmm, A touch of class what could that signify? Stationary? I think i'll say I ordered some stationary. Yep.

I guess curiousity over came me, and there I was entering my information to buy one. I am so crazy. But who knows, maybe I'll practice with it, and find an angle that would allow me to orgasm through sex. Although, I was getting pretty close this week with Jeff. It's just too...hard to complete....I mean, when he fingers me I can hear him getting tired, and it does take a lot of work. What I've never told him, and he's never caught on, is that once you've brought me to orgasm, and i can keep reaching it under three minutes.

But...I mean it's hard to keep hitting my g-spot with the frequency that I need to make me finally....go over that final hill when it's a whole body thrust that goes into it.

(God is my face red now? I swear I'm the queen of sexual "google" online searches. Now you can add "dildo" to the list, great.)

So it's been a weekend of no sleep, and I was completely exhausted yesterday, but took a huge nap after I worked. So I came home and Heidi and Mer were gonna go to the Sigma Chi drinking social at the Spot. I wasn't going to go, because I didn't really feel like it, as well as I knew I needed the sleep. But....I haven't really been out this whole quarter, and I wanted to spend some q-time with my girls (not just always with Jeff). So I through on a tank top, dark jeans and some boots and off we went.

We got there, and of course it was too early and the place was basically empty. Cue the chill rock music, guys playing pool with the hot pink shirt girl swaying her hips, beer bottle in hand.

"There's no one here, I want to go back" I said.

"No, let's just stay, what else can we do?" Mer pops in.

Of course, she's just crushing on a guy "who may" show up, so I know her motives. There's a girl who drove out here to do something with us, and I think Heidi feels like we should stay because of her, as well as the fact that we got all dressed up and there's no where else to go (What's happening on a Sunday night?)

So now we've been standing outside the club for like 15 minutes looking sillier and more "freshman" like with the count and Heidi's like, "Let's just ask someone if they will serve us."

(Yeah, sure the owner is going to be like, "YES! WE love to serve underage drinkers! Help us get our bar closed down!")

So she asks this guy standing outside if we will get served, and of course he's like, "uh no."

But he's still trying to get us to go in, and says he will buy some pitchers for us or something. (okay.)

So we go in, and I basically feel dumb. I already know some of the guys in the place, I'm wearing a tank top in the middle of winter--which would be fine if club music was on and people were dancing--but it wasn't. We are under-age and our posse is small at four.

But we go, find "Blair" who gets us a pitcher then sit at a booth and sip. Then Jeremiah comes over and chit chats with us. We sit some more, attempting to look fab and interesting while waiting for the place to heat up. Thank goodness it does. More people file in, people talking, people bouncing, drinking beer. Finally we decide it's time to start dancing. I had a pretty good time. "play" danced with Jeremiah, Jamie, and Joe. Jeremiah says he kinda likes Mere. I wish she wasn't so hung up on Kyle because I think Jeremiah is a doll.

He has this sexy...drawl? You know the way you talk, he just has this "grr" in the back of his throat which is so sexy! Typically he wouldn't be my type, but he's grown on me since hanging out at the house and all. I couldn't see him and Mere hooking up at all, but who knows. (Of course, they did end up going back to the house and making out so...)

Like Heidi says, "that girl is the horniest virgin I know!".

Oh! So on Saturday I went up to Snow Trails and heard guitar boy and the gang. They sounded lovely like always. Although, I think they should get more organized before they head up there. Kind of like a set out agenda of what they are going to play from song to song. I also think they should learn how to play some "group" songs. Stuff the crowd likes to sing along with, because that helps get people involved and interested in the band and what they're doing.

It wouldn't hurt if they'd learn how to play some more Dave songs ;) Haha, but that'd be a personal aglaia request. AFterwards we went skiing. Most of the time I spent it with Andy and Rob. Later I taught this cutie named Joe how to ski (down one of the biggest hills his first run!) with Rob. That was pretty funny. And what a trooper! I was impressed he actually went through with it. Guitar boy unfortunatly wouldn't ski because he wasn't properly dressed (although, other than me--no one was dressed to ski!) The weather was perfect....warm compared to what we're used to, nice snow, not crowded. I had a good time, but was incredibly tired that night.

Jeff has been fighting with his 'rents. I feel bad. I don't like seeing him all upset and such, but I don't know how to deal with the situation when I'm in it. I get the feeling he'd rather just seethe and be bitter alone rather than try to shake the feelings off with me.

I have a report due on Wednesday that I don't know how to do. I have to make up a correlational study, and an experiement to test the hypothesis that "happy people score better on math tests".

Instead, I'm horny for no specific reason (but my roomie is home) and frustrated and upset (because of this report).

boo.

I found this diary guy and thought he had some interesting things to say. Here goes:

"We almost always have good sex. But it's always vanilla sex. Let me explain. We kiss. We caress each other's bodies. I caress her breasts. She fondles my genitals. I fondle her genitals. I lick and suck and lick some more on her breasts. I feel her up until she climaxes. Then she concentrates on feeling me up. Sometimes it's a handjob through to completion, but usually we have intercourse. Sometimes with me on top and sometimes with her on top. Done."--.

Why "vanilla", what's the sigfig of using that word to describe the sex? Nice, but nothing special? I find that to be typical of Jeff and I. Sex is always pretty great, but it's a little on the boring side really. I'm trying to work up the guts to ask him about fantasies or what not. We'll see.

Yu-there's definition: "Make Love: When sex is the physical compliment to emotional connection and a caring relationship. It's about being together and sharing. It's not about either person, it's about both."

Ah, now isn't that nice? I agree.