Okay, so I know it's been awhile, but honestly nothing has really been happening in my life.
It's the usual up's and down's and for the most part I'm just doing life. And I kind of hate when I'm just going through the motions, because that's when you do find yourself ten years later wondering what you just did with your life, but I'm not sure how to break out of the cycle.
It'll be nice when it's just job or school not both, because you feel so spread thin. Or maybe you just have more work when you have a 'real' job so it doesn't matter anyway. I don't know. But it's like here, I'm caught between three major jobs (school, serving and position in sorority) and then I have to manage in sleep, the boyfriend and, er...time to play online The Sims.
Haha, just kidding. Although I have been playing the beta version. I'm not too impressed with the game. I did enjoy playing the original Sims pc game, but I had definitly gotten to the point where I needed some "add ons" to make the game a little more interesting. The online version is fun, but it's just so.....long. I mean, I think if you're going on there to literally "role play" and make friends, it's probably a good ol time, but I'm there with this goal of actually successfully "playing" the game, and it's kind of a challenge to do so.
The whole point is to set up this property that is so much fun that everyone comes and visits and hangs out for a long time, making you money and friends. But I could probably play for three hours straight to make 150 dollars......and when some items are in the 25k, 45k, 65k marks--for dumb things like "turntables" then how is that really fun or realistic? As much as I want to sell paintings at 15 dollars each all day long...it gets a bit frustrating and boring. At least in the PC game you can speed it up, so you can finish a painting in 2 minutes (real time) :)
Okay, enough computer nerd talk.
So...school has been okay. I did get results back from my last entry. I ended up getting an A on my paper for WS. I couldn't believe it. Haha, I wanted to jump around the room and yell "see, a sorority girl CAN be an intellectual feminist." Lol, but I restrained myself, and bragged to all my roommates instead--who didn't understand.
And you can't understand until you attend a women's studies class. These are the girls who are...."too cool and enlightned" to wear makeup, shop anywhere but thrift (or make clothes themselves), etc. So here I am--not like I'm a good example of the cliched sorority girl, but I do care about my appearance, and i feel like I completely stick out in the room. And this is a pretty superficial observation, but most of these girls (with or without the makeup...) aren't exactly the most attractive looking people. And not that I'm the most beautiful girl alive, but I feel like being a "pretty girl" i don't necessarily experience things as they do.
And it's all part of understanding oppression and experience, so it's interesting. The same way a guy cannot understand what it really feels like to be a girl....I mean guy have these privilidges--that don't even seem like bonuses, it's just "the way it is"...I'm sure as the "pretty girl" things just seem like that's how they always are, when in reality I'm experiencing a life quite different.
This goes along with class, race, and so on. We all view the world differently, because the world reacts to each person differently. So I do feel "different" in my WS classes, because i'm not the outcast, I wasn't originally different, and on some level I feel separated from the girls because I'm not "one of them." And I know it sounds like I'm reading into it a lot differently, but the moment I declared myself a double major with Women's Studies, it was like I was so much more comfortable in that classroom, because it gave me some element of acceptability. I could at least have some respectability, not some sorority girl that just wandered into the wrong class.
This WS class especially has been a real eye opener for me. I absolutely love my teacher. I would rank her number two in best teacher ever (after 5th grade Mr. Hammock, of course :). She's beautifully intelligent, open, kind, and accepting. She makes everyone feel genuinely smart, and encourages the open sharing of ideas, without letting people run away on tangents. Her lectures are organized, group discussions are thought-provoking, and the readings are directly related to class content.
Not always, but usually I leave the class with a head full of ideas. She makes me critically think about the world around me, in ways that before I never challenged. It's just an amazing experience to feel like I'm actually learning something, and not just facts and information, but I feel like I am learning critical thinking abilities. It's almost...fun, I feel like she makes my brain work--and I'm not mad at her for making me do it ;)
Some classes i know i have to work hard, and the coursework is challenging, but it's not...fun or helpful. It just feels like more work. In this class, I have to make a real effort to think about the readings and to talk about what I took from them, and it's interesting, because I hear other people's comments and it's like "oh yeah!". It's like....learning a riddle each day, it's very...interesting to watch and experience.
I have to run to work. Bye!
